2 Years Ago Today...

2 years ago today my dad took his own life.

I was out with friends when my brother called me with the news.  I was completely in shock.

I didn't tell ANYONE what happened.  I didn't want to talk about it.

This was by far the most shocking, sad, embarrassing, confusing, and life changing event that has happened during my short time on this earth.  I knew my dad was sick, but did not know how bad.  Mental illness is a strange thing like that.  It grows and evolves, but there is such a stigma that it's hard to talk about, and there are not easy pathways to get help.  When my dad pulled away, out of my life, I just let him.

My heart hurts so badly for the pain and hurt and horrible things that went on in my dad's head that lead him to end things.  My heart hurts for those that are dealing with mental illness personally or with a loved one.  If you think that someone needs help, they probably do, and it can be so confusing and difficult, but people can be helped.

When I found out about my dad 2 years ago I was set to leave for Kansas 70.3 that next morning, but obviously did not make the trip.  This year I will be racing Eagleman 70.3, for my dad.  When he was healthy, he was happy, supportive and loved watching sports.  He wanted to be right there on the side of the soccer field, or track, or pool.  I never wonder if he was proud of us, because he would be proud of us no matter what.

So I don't know exactly why I'm writing this post, except the only way to break the stigma surrounding mental illness is to talk about it.  I understand the feeling of shame that comes with it (hence why I don't talk about this much), but it is an illness like any other.

An estimated 26.2 percent of Americans ages 18 and older — about one in four adults — suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year.

2014 is Underway!! FL 70.3 race report.

After a long winter in WI, and some time training in AZ and FL in March, the long awaited race season has finally started!!  This weekend I traveled to sunny FL to see how I fared in the heat for a 70.3 season opener.  Here's how it went down (sorry I don't have any race pictures....)

Pre-race: Swim called wetsuit legal!  This was just a surprise (to me) after we swam in this 'Lake' Eva (it's actually a pond, but we're in FL where they also don't know what hills are) in our speed suits and it was GREAT.  I actually felt really good.  Well, despite that, thanks to a very generous friend, I did find a wetsuit to wear so I wouldn't get left behind on the swim.  

Ok, race day! 

Swim:  VERY dark to start, prob should have brought some light or clear goggles, but it ended up fine. I started in toward the buoys and everyone else lined up far left.  I had a great start, swam 500m hard, didn't have to deal with any swim traffic that whole first stretch, and eventually the other girls came over to join me on the buoy line.  I grabbed the feet of Cait Snow (leading the chase pack) and had a fairly chill swim on her feet the rest of the way.  27:14 (only a min down from the 3 leaders...although I didn't know that at the time!) 

Bike:  Got out on the bike and unfortunately Cait was off and gone before I knew it :)  So I just settled in and stuck to my watts and race plan.  A couple other girls came up and I was able to hang with them the rest of the ride (just having someone in sight makes the ride SO much easier!).   April lead the charge for most of the ride and I was feeling pretty good for being able to stick with the pace changes and hold goal watts (same as I was doing last fall) for an early season race where I really haven't had too much outside riding!!  2:25, avg 23.16 mph (yay!) 

Run:  I came into T2 w/April and Amber F.  and we tore out of there.  Amber was heading out at a good clip so I worked a little to try and stay with her but unfortunately reality set in that I was just not used to that heat!!  I was able to run fairly even throughout the run, but I don't think it was very pretty.  

1:30

Overall:  I'm happy with the race!  It's always nice to get the first one out of the way, blow out the cobwebs and see where your fitness is at.  I ended up finishing 6th woman (just 40 sec out of 5th) in a field with some great girls.

"Why didn't I go faster?!" lol

I am thankful to be able to do what I do everyday.  I know support comes in many forms, and I have a TON of it!!  THANK YOU!

Next up:  Ironman Texas, May 17

I also have some talks and events coming up and would love to see you: 

TOMORROW, Tues Apr 15 Endurance House Middleton, Swim Training for Triathlon, Free swag! 6pm talk, 6:30pm fun run

May 23-25  Weekend Tri Camp!  All levels welcome - supported swim, bike, run, guest speakers and meals provided!  Madison Area, more info or to sign up: Tri-Camp

May 30  Wetsuit Clinic, Fireman's Park in Verona, Blue Seventy suits on hand to try out, free! 

Some fun after the race :)  

Full results:

Swim, bike, run, burrito. Day 2 CEC camp.

Today we met at Ventana Canyon with our cars packed to the hilt for day 2 of CEC pro camp.   I won't bore you with the nitty gritty, but lets just say we did it all and enjoyed some great mild weather today!

(Big thanks to Wattie for the photos)

We swam. 

4400yd strength swim

We biked.

~3 hrs, including climb up to Windy Pt. (14 miles) on Mt. Lemon. 

We ran.

Short run off the bike w/a 5 min build to something much faster 

than the recommended half IM pace we were instructed :) 

We ate some awesome mexican food.  

mmmm.  it was a good day. 

Escaping Winter - Training Camp!

It's about time I get back on the 'blog' wagon, and it seems that training camp is always a time that I  feel like sharing.

To rewind a bit first:  This has been the best winter of my adult life :)  I have the best man I can imagine, a lifestyle I wouldn't trade for anything in the world, and am healthy!  Putting on the snowshoe races proved to be just what I needed to stay busy and motivated during the coldest January we have had in WI.  We had growing numbers and I am PUMPED to find out that the Snowshoe National Championships are in WI next year!  SO I will do my best to make at least one of the Snowshoe Scurry races a qualifier.

Additionally, on the training front, I have been able to get in a great groove and am probably in my best 'winter' shape ever.  This has got me super excited to start racing but also motivated to continue to try and make some improvements all around before rushing into anything.  There is always so much work to be done!!

So last week I was able to visit my sister and her great fiancé Travis in the Miami, FL area.  We had a great time running, laying on the beach, and checking out their favorite restaurants.  I do love a recovery week :)

Now I'm here in sunny Tucson for my 3rd adventure at Cliff English's pro camp.  He puts this on for his athletes each year and it's a great time to get some face time with coach (only a couple athletes actually live here) and reconnect with everyone from previous years :)  I am excited to get to it all this week, especially getting some miles in on my new Trek!!

Check back all week for stories, pictures, and video!  You can also find another perspective from fellow camper Chris Bagg

Thanks for stopping by!

Jackie

It's FULL ON Winter!

Well, my FB and twitter feed is full of people pictures of the temperature and weather....in their car, on their phone, from the TV...it's pretty crazy around here.  But, we live in WI, where we should expect it to be cold, so let's just move on.


I haven't posted since IM Cozumel, which feels like it was a year ago!  I took a really nice few weeks off and enjoyed the holidays and some fun with friends and family.  It felt great to take it easy!!  I'm back into a bit of training now, but have also kept very busy with planning of the Snowshoe Scurry.  This has been a fun new project and I'm so excited with how it's going.  We have snowshoe races every Sunday in January here in the Madison area.

If you live here, I hope you will come check it out!!  This Sunday we are at Donald Park.

In other news, I am still in the works of planning the 2014 race schedule, but right now I am looking at a spring IM (which I haven't done in a few years!), some 70.3 in the summer months, IM WI and then maybe one more IM at the end of the year again.

If you know me, you know I am always thinking and planning new projects, businesses, or you name it...well, this works well as a pro triathlete, since we truly have to get creative with how we make money....since we all know there is actually very little money in triathlon.  Because of this, I have added a 'Donate' button to my blog here to try and raise funds to pay for my pro license this year.  It costs $800 just to race pro on the WTC (Ironman) circuit.  I know I am very lucky with Sponsors   and am lucky to be living my passion but I am also very thankful and appreciative of all of the support I get and believe that relationships are truly what make the world go round!

Thanks for reading :)

Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.
Buddha 

Ironman Cozumel 2013

Hey!  I made it to off season!!

I was lucky enough to travel to Mexico again for my last race of the year.  Ironman Cozumel is truly an amazing race, venue, and community.  The volunteers go above and beyond and the community support top notch, a close second to Madison (of course).  I came into this race feeling more fit than last year, and with another year of racing under my belt I had that much more experience of how to race and make it the best race possible.  I didn’t go into the race with any expectations except to execute the race the best I could.   I ended up in 8th place (made enough to pay for the trip!) and am overall happy with the day....like every race, I learned plenty of lessons :) 

Pre-race prep with Jennifer - nice easy ride to the east coast of the island. 

We found a pool!  Super happy for this since the Ocean was 'closed' because of the current and waves. 

On our way to Bike/T1 drop on Saturday 

SWIM:  The swim was shortened due to an unsafe current and swim conditions.  After my struggles in the current last year, I was actually happy to hear this news.  It seemed like a logistical nightmare to have everyone get to the T1 (old swim start) and then re-load on busses to the new swim start 1.9 miles down the road, but somehow they seemed to pull it off flawlessly.   It was an in water start and a point-to-point swim with the current.  All went fairly smoothly and I had some nice feet to hang on almost all of the swim.  I came out in 37:22, a perfect spot right with the girls I wanted to be with! 

BIKE - 3 loops, 112miles, 5hr14min:  I flew through T1, determind not to let this group leave me in the dust.  Since racing with power at Ironman Florida and Rev3 Florida in November, I had a good idea of where I wanted to be and luckily the girls were riding in just that zone.  It is truly a completely different race when you’re out there as a pro.  It can be a lonely bike ride, which is why you see small groups form during the race.  It is amazing how just having  1 or 2 other people in your sights or nearby can make it seem easier.  The headwind was much worse than last year on the far side of the island.  I think it’s a 12 mile stretch, but it felt like FOREVER.  By the 3rd loop there were some serious packs (peleton’s) of men age-groupers catching up, that proved to be extremely annoying, disruptive, and dangerous.  They were riding with no regard what -so-ever to the rules of passing, drafting, or even just general cycling ettiquite.  There was almost no way out of it and at many points I found myself just riding on the far left (oncoming traffic) lane to avoid getting mixed in or knocked off my bike.  Ugh.  Finally an official did show up and threw out plenty of warnings, however I only saw 1 penalty go out.  

Out there on the bike is where I think I started to chip away at my chances for an awesome race.  Between the wind on each lap and trying not to get hit/mixed up with the guys on the last 20 or so miles of the ride I completely ignored nutrition.  I wasn’t used to the gatorade so I wasn’t drinking much, it was windy so the sweat was evaporating quickly, and I just didn’t eat enough calories.  I got off the bike in a deficit, which made for an extremely challenging last leg of the race.  

RUN - 3 times out and back:  I knew I was already in tough shape starting the run, but sometimes I can salvage things.  I pushed all my worries aside, reminded myself it was the last race of the year, and planned to give it all I could.  I left T2 with another pro (girl in red, Celine I think, ended up 4th) and thought “ok, run with her”....this was not a good idea!  Another lesson - stick to YOUR OWN RACE.  Chick went out hard and stubborn me was like ‘Just stick with her, you’ll settle in’.  First mile was ~6:30 and yep, then I knew I needed to not worry about this chica.  Maybe she would die and come back to me :)  After that first one the miles really just got slower and slower as the marathon went.  I was taking everything I could at the aid stations thinking something would get some snap back in my legs, but nothing worked.  I slugged it out, and experienced what it feels like to bonk and cramp during an Ironman.  I don’t wish this upon anyone!!  One false move, or running too fast and one or both quads and/or my right hamstring would just shut down.  Wow, it was tough.  I went through the 2nd loop still in 5th or 6th and knew it would take all the mental and physical gusto I had left to keep a run going for the last loop.  I was on the aid station to aid station plan, which soon turned into the walk the aid station plan, which turned into only walk once between aid station plan.  It was not pretty...and I know it never is toward the end, but this was a new version of the ‘Ironman shuffle’ that I really hope to never do again.  I ran (and walked) a 3:31 giving every single thing I had and managed to hang on for 8th place.  

Overall: 9:27, (swim 0.5mi short), 8th place woman

This race panned out much differently than I thought it would (obviously didn’t envision the run going that way), but I am very happy with how it turned out.  I love racing as much as ever!  There are lessons to learn at each race, and just because it doesn’t go as planned doesn’t mean it isn’t a success.  This was another lesson to me in racing my own race and another true test of mental toughness and motivations for finishing.  When your body wants to give out and stop so bad YOU have to be the one to make it go.  No amount of cheering, support, friends, or anything else can make you go.  The motivation and drive has to come from you.  How bad do YOU want it?  What are YOU racing for?  You need to be so strong in your conviction to complete what you came to do that you can’t be derailed, whether it’s finishing the race before the cutoff, reaching a time goal, or improving in a certain area, fully commit to it.  

ANYHOW!  I am excited for off season and to get back at it for another great year next year.  Huge thanks to everyone for the support throughout this entire year:  Mark (love you), Cliff English Coaching, Timex Multisport Team, Powerbar, Endurance House, Speed Cycling, Computrainer, Rudy Project, Powertap, Peak Performance Massage, and everyone else who had a hand in helping me live my passion.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart.  

Thanks for reading! 

Ironman Cozumel Travel Guide

This post may be a couple days late for some traveling to Cozumel this year, but some things may still come in handy.  This is my second year taking the trip to Mexico for an end of the season race and I know there are many people, like me, looking forward to some warm sun!

Travel Logistics:

• Avoid Flying with your bike - it turns into a HUGE hassle.  I use Tri-bike Transport. 
• Flying into Cancun is generally cheaper and makes for a bit of an adventure getting to Cozumel.  When you land, collect your luggage and find the ADO bus  (ask for 'ahh-deh-oh') to take you to Playa Del Carmen for the ferry.   You will be approached by MANY taxi/bus drivers from private companies wanting to take you to the ferry.  You can haggle price with these guys, and if you are a small group, this can be an affordable option.  If you decide on the bus, you can purchase the tickets online before your trip, but I think it's easier to buy them when you get there incase you have delays in travel or get there early.  After an hour bus ride you are dropped at the bus stop in Playa Del Carmen, which is just a few blocks from the ferry stop.  You can easily purchase ferry tickets as you approach the ferry. 
• If you have ever had motion sickness, take precautions for the ferry ride.  I like the motion sickness bracelets, or just regular dramamine.  It is ~45min ride to Cozumel.  
• When you get to Cozumel there are plenty of taxi drivers waiting there to take you to your hotel/house/condo.  You need to have the address of where you are going (and maybe even a map so you can point to where it is if you don't know much spanish) and make sure to have pesos to pay them. 

Ferry to and from the Island!

Entrance to the Ferry in Playa Del Carmen

Money: 

• Check with your debit card on charges for using ATM in Mexico, most charge a small fee and something like a 3% charge for the total removed.  There is an ATM right by the ferry at Playa del Carmen if you didn't get to convert any money before that. 
• You can bring cash to the airport and use a money conversion station there...usually a small fee associated with that, but nice to have it done.  
• Any taxis and many vendors are cash only in Mexico.

Plenty of nice relaxing ocean front space...especially on the southern part of the island. 

Phone: 

• Probably best to keep your phone off.   Even with an international plan, there are usually some charges still associated with calling, and especially data usage.  Things that seem very simple, like checking Facebook, add up on data very quick....for example, Verizon charges $5.12/MB.  Accepting texts are much cheaper than sending, and this is a cheaper option than calling... (on Verizon it costs 0.05 to get a text, 0.50 to send, and 0.99/min to talk)
• Most hotels and condo's you stay will have wifi, so just take yourself back to the pre-smart phone days and do your computing on the computer, and use Skype to talk to your friends and family at home :) 

Race Logistics:

Swim start at Practice swim pre-race

Nice paved bike path to ride to swim start from town!

• The swim start and T1 are a few miles south of the expo/finish/T2 area.  There are plenty of shuttles provided by the race and hotels that leave from the main expo area to get you to the pre-race dinner and swim start race morning.  You can ride your bike to the pre-race swim if you are up for it, or you will probably have to get a taxi.  This is one of the the only Ironman races where I think it somehow works to go without renting a car....BUT if you need one, you can find one from most major hotels that have daily rentals available. 
• Separate transitions means that when you drop of that T2 bag you will not see it again until during the race...make sure everything is in there that you need.  
• 3 lap bike and 3 out and back run = an awesome race with tons of spectators.  This is a good thing.  This race rivals the BEST crowd support of any Ironman. 



Athlete check-in. 



T1, hanging bags that you grab on the way to the changing tent. 



Great bike racks! 

• They give you water in bags on the run.  Yep, bags.  You have to bite off the corner and try to  spill water into your mouth.  It's great, ice cold water. 

Where to stay: 

• Cozumel has PLENTY of places to stay for all sorts...there are your all-inclusives which tend to be busy with people and entertainment, there are homes for rent or small condo style rentals.  Last year I stayed in an AWESOME place, Villa El Encanto.  It's a small place, with ~8 condo's where the family that runs it lives on the same property...gated, pools, hammock, very tidy, nice rooms, and a perfect location for the race.  Very competitively priced and walking distance to the grocery store.  I like the condo/home rental for racing so I can cook my own food :) 

The bakery section ROCKS. 

Peacocks roaming at Villa El Encanto!!

VERY relaxing :) 

Thanks for reading and let me know if you have any questions!  I may learn more on this trip and update my post.  Happy travels!